Au Revoir

Assalammualaikum and happy weekend, people!

I realized that I am bad at parting with other people especially when it comes to people that I love or comfortable with. This week I made an unexpected the expected decision to quit my services as tutor in 2 tuition centres where I've been working since 2012. I've been expecting to quit as a tutor this year at those tuition centres but I didn't expect that I will be quitting this soon :'(. 

I didn't plan to tell the owner, one of the tuition centre after discussing about the coming intensive class during school break, but may be it's Allah planning for me that suddenly I blurted out the matter to her. I can see the unpleasant and sad looking from her about that unforeseen matter. Yes, we are quite comfortable with each other when it related about working. Same reaction cannot be avoided to the other owner of the tuition centre (both husband and wife) when I told them yesterday. Obviously, I know their feeling. It has been 5 years, we have been very comfortable with each other, not much to be complaint about my performance during my services and they have been good to me since then. They wish that I am doing great in my future undertakings. As usual, I dont have much to say and that's me. My silence is my hideous feeling to show my expression as usual.

But, decision had been made. I have decide to move on with my life line. I cant stay for too long at stagnant or comfort phase, that what I am till now. I keep on moving. I need to learn and explore many things in my journey, that's the way I know myself and the world better. It is just not about me, it is all about everything that crossing path in my life that called destiny. Everything in my life is so meaningful to me, including the journey of 5 year experiences as a tutor at that two tuition centres. Thank you for the experiences and the memories. Till we meet again!

 

"See you when I see you"

It's my Birthday again

Assalammualaikum and Happy Monday, peeps!

I am so blessed that this year my birthday (13th of May) was fall in between of Nisfu Syaaban  (12th of May) and Mother's day (14th of May). I wanna thanked to all those birthday wishes, duas, treats and presents that I cant expressed just with the words to say them. May Allah blessed you all and ease everything for you all, Amin! 

As for me for my birthday, I am not looking for any of birthday suprises, presents or treats. It is just enough to be remembered by close family, relatives and friends who are meant so much to me. As the age keep added up, I am thankful to Allah to give chance to live another day in this world, to have room of improvement on my faith as a muslim, to serve better for myself, family, people that meant so much to me and other people as well, Insha Allah. 

But the most important thing when my birthday come, it makes me reminded of the most person that I missed in this world (my late mom) who have struggled to give me a breech birth and for every second of my heart beats, I owed you. This is what birthday meant for me, it's my late mom celebration too. But, Allah love her more as He took her away from me. Nothing stays except Him. 

The best moments when it come to my birthday, I can spend time with people I love as they put a lots of effort just to celebrate my bithday. Thank you, Guys! Love you all.

Appreciation that just not enough to be expressed just by words

Although it is just a bday wishes songs, it meant a lot to me

And thank you for all these. It might be not captured in this videos but it always stay in my memories lane

May Allah blessed all of us.

Stay strong, wise and happy!!

Pesan Arwah Ibu: Bila duduk dengan orang Lain

Arwah ibu pernah pesan kalau hidup berdikari,

Kena pandai jaga diri,

Jangan sampai orang benci,

Arwah ibu pernah pesan walau duduk ramai pun satu rumah,

Kena sentiasa bersih dan tak berkecah,

Jangan beritahu satu dunia, "aku duduk ramai orang satu rumah",

sebab selipar kat luar bersepah.

Arwah ibu pernah pesan,

kalau buat kerja rumah tu biar sama-sama,

Kena ada common sense dan ada timbang rasa,

benda tu tak perlu belajar sampai ambil kelas semata-mata,

Arwah ibu pernah pesan,

kalau pinjam barang orang kena minta izin,

dah bagi pinjam kena pandai jaga sehingga brg dipulangkan.

  Sekadar peringatan bersama kalau duduk menyewa bersama tidak kira sesama kawan, keluarga atau orang asing sebab kekadang kita tak berani menegur takut terasa hati. Jadilah orang yang bertimbang rasa ya! Peace >_<

~Tamat~

A weekend of Engagement

My past weekend was very hectic specifically occupied with family vacation and 2 engagement events that special to my life.

**My Friend, May got hitched (29th April 2017)**

I knew her since 2012 during my early phD study at first as postgraduates student (very common for us to use the same lab) and then turn into friendship due to have same interest to get fit and unexpectedly became close as good friends ( a bunch of 5 girls called ourselves 5 budak hitam). 

And unexpectedly it turned out that she was the 1st one who got hitched although she's the youngest among 5 of us. Seriously, it happened so fast. This is the prove of Qadha and Qadar Allah, it happens at the right time, so perfect and beautiful moment. After gone through pains and bad experiences with wrong persons, she worth enough to meet the best man that stand for her every single little time. I am really happy for her and I dont have any reason for not to attend her engagement day to witness Allah's miraculous (although I have a tight schedule to fit in between family vacation and my friend's happy day).

We roughly designed the mini pelamin set for the event. That was my handwriting on the screen board, artistic right >_<

My gorgeous and beautiful girlfriend that got hitched, it's May!

and this is a picture 5 of us (Lima Budak Hitam was named after our tanned looked after our vacation in Krabi Island last year). We only managed to get this best shot since Ina (2 from the right) was real photographer for the event and we are pretty busy doing errands.

 and give chance for me to snap my OOTD for the event

~the end~

 

**My little cousin now become a real gentleman, (1st May 2017)**

 

He was the first male cousin in my late mother's side who was a step further from the other to become a real gentleman, although the eldest one is my little brother (malay called it 'pecah telur'), salute and great job cousin. After tahlil and doa selamat recital a day before we with almost 10 cars delegation to propose the lady of my cousin's heart in Buloh Kasap, Segamat from Pedas Negeri Sembilan, a very long journey and I learnt many new Negeri Sembilan's customs ('adat') did by our ancestors since this is the first time propose a girl, thus we request our elders to have the conversation for our representative to discuss the details of the next step. Islam is religion of ease and simple but I can see our ancestors' customs that make it difficult some how, but it worth to experience those though. 

 

My twin cousin (Khuzainie and Khuzairie), My lil brother and Angah Lotfan (same series generation)

 

 My family photo after reaching the location

We are sisters

Dulang girls get ready

My beloved aunt with her future daughter in law after pull on the ring

Future husband and wife, may Allah ease the way..Amin

Congratulation, cousin!

OOTD for the event (please tahan muntah)

cheese >_< ok now can vommit hehehe

~the end~

Below are 7 etiquettes of seeking spouse in Islam

by Samana Siddiqui

1. Ask yourself: Why am I getting married?

Marriage is a commitment and relationship that starts in this Dunya (world) and will continue Insha Allah in Paradise together

2. Ask yourself: what am I looking for in a spouse.

Abu Hurairah related that the Prophet said: “Men choose women for four reasons: for their money, for their rank, for their beauty and for their religion, but marry one who is religious and you will succeed” (Bukhari, Muslim).

This of course, applies to women as well.

3. If you're looking for a spouse lower your gaze.

This may seem like a contradiction, but it's not. Looking for a spouse who has the right qualities and whom you are physically attracted to does not mean throwing out the obligation to lower the gaze for both sexes.

“Tell the believing men to lower their gaze and be modest. That is purer for them. Lo! Allah is aware of what they do” (Quran 24:30).

4. Get someone to help

Marriage is not something to throw yourself into all by yourself. Getting the help of someone, especially parents, relatives, an Imam, and/or respected and trustworthy members of the Muslim community to either look for the right spouse or initiate and participate in a communication process is very important.

Involving others, by the way, does not mean signing over your right to say yes or no to a marriage proposal. It simply increases the likelihood of finding out important information about a prospective partner in a way that maintains rules of Islamic modesty (i.e. not meeting alone, see next point).

Getting that third party involved also helps verify if the person you are interested in is decent, honest and respectful. This person(s) often checks out references, asks about the individual's character and behavior, and looks out for your best interest in general.

5. Always ask for references

This is also where your “third party” comes in handy. Not only will they be able to be your reference. They can also check out a prospective mate's references.

A reference can include an Imam who knows the brother who proposed to you, a sister who knows the woman you may want to marry well, a family friend, a boss, a co-worker, and/or business partner.

A note about honesty and references: the people you ask may know something not very nice about your prospective spouse. Remind them that if they reveal this information, they would not be backbiting from the Islamic perspective. In fact, in the case of seeking marriage, complete information should be given about an individual, both good and bad.

6. When you meet, don't be alone

The Prophet said: “Whenever a man is alone with a woman the Shaytan makes a third” (Tirmidhi).

He also advised men: “Not one of you should meet a woman alone unless she is accompanied by a relative within the prohibited degrees” (Bukhari, Muslim)

7. When you speak, be businesslike and to the point.

The purpose of meeting and talking to each other must also remain within Islamic guidelines. That means no flirtatious speech of a sexual nature on either side.

Hope this could help you guys to find your future zauj or zaujah that bring the best in you and partner to the road of Jannah, Insya Allah.

Klinik dan Aku

Assalammualaikum dan a very Good Afternoon, peeks!

Pagi tadi, aku pergi Klinik Kesihatan Seri Kembangan sebab nak check telinga aku since last Saturday waktu aku swimming telinga masuk air. Since then, pendengaran aku terganggu. Dah la dengan ada majlis keluarga, konfem orang cakap aku sombong sebab panggil2 tak bersahut, padahal mmg xdengar sebab telinga bdengung jek. Dah satu kerja aku dah kena explain kat orang, "kalau nak cakap or panggil ke, cakap kuat sikit sbb telinga problem" 😅😅. Dah tu kalau berbual, aku kurang respon dari kebiasaan sbb xdengar butir2 perbualan sudahnya aku banyak menyengih jek. Nampak x sshnya bila Allah tarik nikmat tu. Paling x menahan, bila Tadarrus Al-Quran tu mmg plg terkesan sbb xdengar bacaan ko tu betul ke tak, sudahnya asyik merepeat jek bacaan sbb x konfiden. Tu yang buat aku nekad ke klinik utk check up. Normally if swimming telinga masuk air, it will take only the most pon 2 hari jek back to normal hearing. So mmbr suggest g check takut ada infection walupun tak de sakit or telinga berair.

 

So, aku decide utk pergi klinik kerajaan sebab lama na tak visit. Boleh buat observation for their services dan ground observation utk diri sendiri since pagi ni tak de hal yang penting nak kejar. Overall the services were good and fast for gov clinic and hospital. Urusan keselurhan aku dari ambil no, pendaftaran, basic check-up like body temperature and bp, tunggu masuk utk check by doc only take 1 hr and 40 mins. Mgkin tunggu ubat skali will take less than 2 hrs procedures. Alhamdulillah,  xde infection kat telinga, Dr kata bersih even ear boogey pon clean. Dr kata mungkin it took longer for my ear back to normal functioning. Dr just suggestion kan utk kurangkan keselesaan tu pergi farmasi utk ear drop. Case settled.

There was something I want to share kepada sesiapa yang baca blog aku ni, please apply cuti and follow ur parent bila them all go to clinic or hospital walau atas urusan ambil unat sekalipun. Sedih and sebak bila aku nampak sowg chinese aunt sorong wheel chair husband dia untuk buat appointment check up, terkocoh2 tolak wheel chair dengan nak buat urusan semua. Salute kat that old chinese aunt, tak merungut pon. Hati aku rentan tgk scene tu, menitik gak la air mata aku. Perlahan2 aku seka takut orang lain perasan, walupun nampak tough tapi hati aku tisu humanity ni. Tapi rakyat Malaysia ni masih ada yang prihatin, sowang middle-aged indian woman tolong chinese aunt td sebelum aku sempat hulurkan bantuan. Mungkin that indian woman tu nampak chinese aunt td perlukan bantuan. 

Aku percaya, what comes around goes around. Please, spend time teman parent kita g klinic, hospital or apa2 la urusan yang dowg kena buat yang melibatkan beratur, menunggu tu. Kudrat dowg tak kuat mana pun, keupayaan deria pon tak sesihat orang muda. Lagi satu, kalau wife tu mengandung buat check up, please yang suami2 tu apply cuti temankan jugak. Rezeki kan Allah yang bagi. Dowg mengandung zuriat kowg tu. 

***Be considerate and kind pada orang lain tak kira mana kita berada***

Ni plak aku nak ceritakan kisah aku dan klinik. Career as a Doctor mmg impian aku sejak kecik lagi. So, mula duduk boarding school kalau selagi berpeluang jumpa Doc aku akan pergi, sebab aku suka interview Doc yang rawat aku tu tanya pasal career as a doctor, qualification and all those things related to it. Ak jarang fallen sick, ada time tu aku buat2 sakit mata la, cirit la jadi ada peluang keluar asrama visit Doc. Aku budak MRSM, based on trial SPM aku, aku di offer utk buat fast track preparation untuk buat medical ke Ireland that time. Tapi aku tolak sebab parent aku cakap too early and better masuk matriculation dulu (biasalah parent kan insecure lain macam nak2 kena antar anak kesayangan dowg ni ke overC). Waktu tu aku dapat rasakan yang ibu aku kalau leh nak aku jadi cikgu, so dia indirectly bgtau yang dia tak setuju dengan bdg doctor ni. 

Bila admitted to matric, aku punya excited utk jadi Doc ni dah berkurangan atas satu sebab. Rata2 aku tanya pengalaman Doctor yang aku interview, semua cakap kena rajin baca, per day they have to memorize details reference book more than 10 pages, effort pulak 200% weh kena letak. Satu bahana yang mmg since kecik aku tak leh nak cope, baca buku! Kalau program nilam tu pilih buku yang plg nipis, berwarna dan bergambar untuk tarik minat ak membaca. Novel mmg haram aku nak baca la dulu. Macam mana aku belajar? Frankly speaking, aku fokus 100% kat kelas or lecture hall. Fokus aku mmg dasat sampai orang sebelah cakap ngan aku pon aku tak perasan walupun aku respon kat dowg that time. Mmg payah nak tengok aku buat revision kat rumah atau bilik. Sebab tu Allah jadikan setiap benda hidup tu seimbang imbalan dia. Subhanallah! Walaupun Allah jadikan aku boleh la dikatakan sedikit cerdik, tapi aku jenis malas  nak ulangkaji. Kalau kowg tanya aku, aku salute orang2 yang rajin sbb rajin leh jadi pandai dapat lebih sikit dari orang yang cerdik ni. Ok, nak dijadikan cerita disebabkan itu aku make up mind pilih career len, not a doctor walupun result matriculation aku lps untuk apply as a doctor ( bkn 4 flat ye 😂). Kebetulan, waktu tu PM kita Pak Lah naikkan sektor pertanian, so aku pikir byk peluang kerjaya dalam bidang tu plus my biology teacher suggest jadi la Doctor Pokok, kerjaya yang susah mengikut perkiraan beliau (masa tu lebih berupa cabaran beliau utk aku). Sudahnya, aku apply Sains Pertanian di UPM as my first choice masa apply UPU utk degree aku followed by bidang education in Math, Bio and Sains dalam pelbagai pilihan universiti tempatan. Padahal, tak pernah tersenarai dalam pilihan career waktu kecik aku dulu. And here I am still stucked in this field.

**lanjutan cerita pasal aku**

Tetiba semalam aku terdetik dalam kotak fikiran aku nak jadi doktor medic sebab aku nak buat volunteer work kat mana2 camp refugees atau mana2 country (keep on moving depend on keperluan services dalam volunteer tersebut). Nampak macam menarik. So, is medic lah sebenarnya jalan takdir career ak? Sebab skunk ni field aku ni pon seem ssh untuk aku kecapi like something is not in place in my life journey. Too much uncertainties and the road seem blurred in my career path. Aku just keep on moving fwd dengan apa depan mata berserta back- up plan dan tawakkal semestinya. I am born to be a fearless. I am very intriguing to know what my life lead to, may Allah ease my journey. Amin.

**the end of the sharing**